Tuesday, June 22, 2004

TUESDAY, JUNE 22D.

This is day 408 of my darling wife's deployment to Iraq.

One year, one month, three weeks.

I talked to my sweet wife last night. It concerns me to learn that she is having a tough time keeping a level perspective.

She tells me that whenever she gets excited over the prospect of coming home soon that her emotions then jump in and send her crashing down again, saying to her "remember what happened last time".

If you've been reading for some time you know that last time she had already begun the journey home...had made the dangerous convoy from deepest darkest Baghdad to the airport...had already turned in her ammunition...and then the word of the extension hit.

I have supposed since then that this was a huge blow, but I haven't come up against evidence of its residual effects until last night.

She tells me that "folks have noticed" that she often isn't her normal spirited self. Given that her spirit is her best asset, this is disturbing. I am concerned that perhaps the pressure has left her more fragile than I anticipated.

I'm praying there are no delays, no changes in plans for her and the others. I know now that even the most optimiistic among them do not look forward with any certainty...and thus life becomes truly day to day. Eliminating the future eliminates hope. Only home and hearth and hugs can restore that.

1 comment:

timsarmywifey said...

Hope deferred makes the heart sick but desire fulfilled is a tree of life.
---- Prrov. 13:12

Strongs says this: life is: Cchay alive, have life, sustain life, revive from sickness-discouragement or death,envigorate.


I know that I have felt like Patti as well. The last BN FRG meeting all the wives were happy cause of the dates getting moved up and I am too but I just can't get excited yet. It's like having small little coals burning but they haven't been fanned into flame yet because I can't allow them to be.

Tell Patti we love her and are looking forward to BBQ's and wine!!
Hugs to her,